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Jim Killam teaches journalism at Northern Illinois University and is a freelance writer who has been married 25 years. Jim
offers practical advice to his son, soon to --wed. I have taken the liberty to make Jim’s references inclusive because these
insights apply to any committed couple.
This article was reprinted in the Pine Rest Family Institute Newsletter from Christianity Today 2010.--Tips on How to Navigate
a Marriage/Partnership --
* Praising in front of other people does wonders for her self-esteem.
* If you give a compliment, mean it.
* Criticizing in front of others, even in jest, is always a bad idea, always!
* Sometimes, they don’t want you to solve the problem, just want you to listen. I know, I don't understand it either.
* Don't fall for that line of garbage that says unions are a ball and chain. Think about the people who tell you that. Many would
give anything to have what you have.
* Sometimes, impractical as it seems, it's better to spend $500 on a trip than $500 on furniture. Provided you have the $500.
* Credit card debt is a monster. Don't fall for it, even for the short term.
* Don't keep financial secrets from each other. They do not remain secret.
* Live on less than you make. In fact, learn to live on one income. Swim against the tide.
* Tithe. Not only does it honor God, it also brings focus to the rest of your money decisions.
* Before attempting even the smallest plumbing job, know where the whole-house water shutoff is located; just sayin'.
* Finding a recreational activity you love doing together will change your life, especially if it's cheap or free.
* Laughing together is even better for you than exercising together.
* A cheap, used car gets you to exactly the same place in the same amount of time as a new car does, except when it breaks
down.
* Don't be so afraid of hurting the other's feelings that you never really talk about how you feel. It took five years of
marriage before finally admitted I didn't like grape jelly, which had been put on my peanut butter sandwiches every day.
* If you're in a store together, be careful about saying you like an item. You are likely to receive it as a gift.
* Bubble gum is not an advisable electrical fastener.
* Wanting a pet is a lot more fun than owning a pet.
* Don't be too embarrassed to talk about sex together.
* Praying together every day might be the most intimate thing you can do, even more than sex.
* Pray together before any big decision and most small ones. The ultimate decision is far less important than the fact you are
praying together about it.
* Be stewards, not consumers.
* Moving every few years is a good way to take stock of how much unnecessary stuff you have.
* Observe a no-TV week once in a while. It'll still be there when you get back and there still won't be anything worth watching.
* Find regular times of quietness, both together and alone. Watching a Cubs game doesn't count.
* Do not attempt exploratory surgery on a broken dishwasher. You can call the appliance technician now or later. Save years
of humiliation. Call now.
* Hold your career with a light touch. It's not who you are, it's only what you do.
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